From A Sincere Heart

Last night we had all church prayer, and to be honest I did not want to go. However inspite of my exhausted state I forced myself to go. I was not disappointed by no means! For the past week the Lord has been speaking to me in dreams. Now I do not mean to spook anyone and make you think I have gone off the deep end. For one instance, I had gone to bed and had a vivid dream about my dad. I woke up out of a dead sleep and just felt deeply impressed to call my dad and pray for him. I tried to ignore, roll over and go back to sleep, but to no avail I could no shake this from my spirit. So finally after an hour and fifteen minutes of battling my self will, I called my dad in the middle of the night weeping, explaining that I HAD to pray for him. Of course he was gracious enough to let me pray for him, and then he of course wanted an explanation.

I began to explain to him what I was feeling in my spirit and the things that I was dreaming about. As I was speaking the words out of my mouth, God began to reveal to me that my family was under extreme spiritual attack. Kaylah's sickness and extreme pain, Kandra's malaria situation, Tessa's struggling with depression and life changing decisions, Mom & Dad's house being rented right out from under them, and my fatigue. Now I realize that if this was happening one situation at a time I would venture to say that it's just life and it happens. However, when we are struggling with such huge issues all at the same time, I'm smart enough to know the enemy does not like what we stand for and will do everything he can to distract us. So last night at prayer I walked in under such a heavy burden and had so much on my mind that it was difficult for me to focus. I was kneeling down at the front and just listening to the different ones connect with God. While listening, my radar ears picked up a voice just to my right that moved me to tears. You see it was the voice of Ray Helm. He is a new convert and is so in love with Jesus Christ. He really doesn't know the "pentecostal" way of praying - oh wait yes he does, he knows how to connect with a Savior who loves him. He realizes the price that was paid for his soul, therefore he is so grateful for the changes that have come to his life. For quite some time I just sat and wept and listened to this man pray.

Finally, I entered my own realm of just thanksgiving to God for being so accessible. I began to praise God for being such a God that does not care about being perfect and praying our perfect pentecostal prayers. What He does desire is for His people to come to Him with a pure heart and pure motives, who are willing to show Him our imperfect state. I began to enter into a realm in the Spirit that I had not been in such a long time. I began to intercede for my family and began to access the blood and plead it over every one of us. I prayed for my dear friends the Willoughyby's, the Royers, the Marquez's, & Timo to name just a few. I didn't pray a prayer of asking, I prayed a prayer of praise and thanksgiving for what God is doing in their lives. Whatever manner He chooses to heal them is His business, however it is our business as His children to praise Him for what He has done through them already and what He will continue to do.

This blog comes from a sincere heart, from one who is doing their best to be transparent about life when it seems the hardest.